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Phone calls you don’t wanna answer


1. Gym
If you’re thinking about putting my number down because you need 10 numbers to win a free drink bottle, let me know first because I’ll buy you two drink bottles just to keep Goodlife off of my ass. These guys obviously work off of commission with a shit base rate because they DO NOT let up. You have to convince them that you’re moving overseas in the hope that the made up country you mention doesn’t have a Goodlife branch there.


2. Bank
Has recent activity put your credit card over its limit? Please check via internet banking or call your local branch if this is a mistake… Nope, no mistake, I was well aware that buying a can of tuna and crackers from Coles for dinner would bring me over my limit. You’re gonna have to wait until pay for your $4.38.


3. Phone companies
Never have I ever receieved a phone call from a telco that I wanted. Whether it’s that you haven’t paid your bill on time, or they’re calling you to tell you about a special offer that they’re specifically offering to you, chances are you never want to hear it.


4. Private numbers
I just can’t commit to picking up a private number. Who knows who’s on the other end of that line, it might be good news, it might be bad. It might be someone telling you that you’ve won $1000, or it might be a distant relative telling you that your great Aunt has passed on. Whatever it is, I don’t like those surprises.


5. Boss
Especially when you’re a casual. Nothing like going to bed late at night watching a whole series of Breaking Bad and knowing that it doesn’t matter because you have the day off in the morning, only to receive a phone call at 7:48am saying you have to come in for a 9am start.


6. Sibling
When you’re curled up on the couch in your pyjamas and you get a call from your sibling it only means one thing. They want something. It’s either to pick them up on the other side of town, or to put their uniform in the washing machine to be fresh for the next day. Whatever it is though, it’s gonna mean getting up off of the comfy couch.


7. Your ex
For starters, what’s there to talk about? This is the moment in every post relationship when you have to keep reminding yourself of all the reasons why you broke up in the first place.


8. THAT friend 
Everyone has that friend that even if you say ‘bye’ twelve times, they still manage to keep you on the phone for an extra 20 minutes every time.


9. Customer
It’s very rare, if not un heard of, that a customer will call you to say what a fantastic job you’re doing. Very rare. When you pick up the phone at work it’s nearly always a complaint.


10. Phone interview
Whenever a prospective employer calls you, even if you says it’s a good time, it’s never a good time. Whether you’re in the middle of the freeway or in the middle of making dinner, they always catch you at the least opportune moment and when you’re caught out like that all of your people skills and abilities to talk yourself up completely go out the window and you end up sounding a bit special. 

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